I was just reading a (sort-of) random blog and I came across a post on why this person had decided, after being raised as a Christian, to become an atheist.
First, let me say that I know absolutely nothing about this person's history or story. Or even who they are today. They may have had a twisted Christian upbringing or had something horrible happen to them. I don't know.
That said, and this sounds naive I'm sure, but I can not understand a complete and total denial of God.
I can understand...
"I believe that God exists, I just don't think I have to do everything the Bible says." or
"I believe in a higher power, that we're not an accident, but I don't know who or what created us."
"I pray sometimes, but I'm not sure who I'm praying to."
or even "I'm not sure who will go to heaven, but I know I'll be there."
I don't agree with any of those (which have been said in conversations I've had with people), but I can at least kind of see where they're coming from. All of them at least are admitting that they are not in control.
However, I simply cannot understand the absolute denial of a higher power. (God.)
Now, I also feel like I should come clean and tell you that I've never not believed in God. I definitely had a few (7 or so) years when I lived how *I* wanted (you fill in the blanks), but I always knew, even during my worst times, that God was real. How could He not be?
I also should tell you though, that I've had my reasons to turn my back on God. My life wasn't easy growing up, to say the least. And I've had many struggles, as we all do.
But my husband, however, believed in nothing until he was 22. Then he succumbed to the Spirit's calling and gave his life to Jesus. And he says that he felt a change. And I've SEEN THE CHANGE in him. It is real, my friends.
God is real. He is SO real. How can people not see it?
How can any of this be chance? How can this world be all that there is?! I simply would find no reason to live, if I believed for one second that this (pretty horrible sometimes) world was EVERYTHING. AND THE END. What a dismal existence!
I believe that this life is important--make no mistake! What we do in this life matters immensely, but not just for the immediate results we get! Every decision I make, I base on what I believe about eternity. That there is an eternity and that we'll either spend it with or without God. (For the record, I believe that we can know for sure if we'll spend it with Him or not. But that is for another day.)
I have a good number of non-Christian friends and I spend a lot of time talking to them about their thoughts on God and spiritual things. And I admit, sometimes I think, What if *I'm* wrong? What if "religion" is a cop-out? I mean, I'm human and have doubts like everybody else!
But then I remember. I look back on my life and I remember. I remember who I used to be (not finished yet!). I remember where I was headed. I remember where He has brought me! I remember His faithfulness! I remember the changes brought about in our lives that only can be God!
I don't have any great theological statements to back myself up right now, (it's late and I don't care) but I can't look around and A) not see God in the beauty of creation, in the beauty and miraculous thing that we call "life" is and B) think that in all the evil that is happening all over the world as I write this silly post, that God won't eventually have the last say.
He WILL return and that gives me hope. Hope for myself, but more importantly for my loved ones.
I will probably never understand why people completely close themselves off to their Creator, who loves them and wants the best for them. I have a feeling it has to do with pride though. You see, in order to believe in God, you have to believe that you are wrong about some things. That you don't have all the answers. That you're not in control. I imagine that's difficult for a lot of people. Especially those of us in a first world country. We don't need God, or at least we don't think we do.
This has been Deep Thoughts with Catie. Thanks for joining me. ;)